It was on my heart...

A recent conversation with family inspired this post.  The conversation was basically about what people, kids, or others don't need to know and others, in the family, making that decision.  This conversation reminded me of a book I read a few years ago.  The main goal of the book, to me, was to highlight the detriment of family secrets.  The book was a very quick (about 77 pgs) read.  To try and give perspective without giving away the entire plot, I will tell you that the book is about a young girl who never knew her father because her mother insisted on keeping it from her.  When the girl turned 18, she went looking for her father and found much more than anyone could have expected.  Now, why am I talking about this book? Because it reminds me of so many conversations that I have had and will have about things people (including myself) just don't know about their families, friends, neighbors.  

As adults and heads of families, the best things we can do for our children is educate them.  Most people would agree with this statement.  However, when I say it, I mean educate them on everything, not just the stuff that will make them money or that is taught in school.  I am talking about the aunt that steals money or puts people in illegal situations, the cousin that is in a gang, the neighbor who takes an extreme liking to little girls, the sister that is bipolar.  Especially tell them these things if there is a possibility that the child will be in contact with any of these people. Tell them the information that helps them maneuver through society.  What we forget is that our children learn things like behavior and trust from us.  If we are talking to the neighbor every day and inviting them to cookouts and such, our child won't see anything wrong with going to the neighbor's house without us.  

Don't get me wrong, I understand that there are nosey people and gossips that just like to start stuff and be in everyone's business but we have to find a balance. It is imperative that we arm our children with the ability to make informed decisions in ALL aspects of life. You are never going to stop curiosity in people especially children, tell them the truth so they know what they are up against.  

Entrepreneur... Not so much!

So, I have owed my friend this post for several weeks now. Let’s see if I can do it justice.  Topic:  ‘What type of business or dream company would you start?  You have a private financial backer so money is not an issue.’   Years ago, I would have thought I knew the answer to this question; today, not so much.  Early on in my career, I had to do this team exercise focused on knowing your colleagues.  From this exercise, a personal statement or representation was created.  My statement was basically that I love helping people and fixing things; that’s what motivates me. 

Over the years, I have found myself in a position of mentoring/guiding/training multiple people (mainly women) in various situations; sometimes requested and others just by the nature of the relationship.  These relationships will drive my response to this question.  So, my company would be one focused on the development of women in their personal, spiritual and professional journeys.  I know it seems weird that I could help someone spiritually but hey, it happens.  Why?  Because it is important that everyone feel confident in themselves, their families, their communities and their jobs. 

Most women (not all) start to lose confidence in themselves and their capabilities at an early age; let me say this differently, women start to develop low self-esteem early in life.  Once low self-esteem if fully rooted, they spend the remainder of their lives trying to increase their self-esteem.  I am not going to dwell on why I think this occurs (that’s a separate post).  This low self-esteem drives women to hide in the shadows, not speak up or out, accept less than, question their validity and more.  These things compounded can destroy families and communities, which is unhealthy for society in general.

Why would that be my company?  Well, quite honestly, I see a need and it makes me happy.  The need shows itself in the following ways:

- Many women are always comparing themselves to someone else, trying to get what the next person has or discounting themselves for upward movement (personally and professionally).

- In the black community, women are more commonly in a position of positive influence for future generations.  If we aren’t proud of who and what we are, it will trickle to future generations.

- The very existence of the woman exudes strength, we shouldn’t be the ones questioning our worth.

This is not to say that I am the personification of high self-esteem or a fully confident woman.  It is to say that I recognized all of these things in myself at some point in my life and I work each day to be better.  You see, life coaches still have coaches themselves, that’s what makes them better. 

I don’t know the specifics but I know I would need confidants.  The confidants would serve as someone always in your corner.  There would have to be some type of vetting process because the last thing anyone needs is to think they are getting help only to find out that someone is deliberately trying to hurt them. 

You know now that I think about it, I should probably really figure out a business plan.  That’s the problem with dreams, they kind of rely on your focus to come to fruition.  Sometimes they seem so far out of reach we tend to leave them.